Thanks for Coming Back
Welcome to "Thanks for Coming Back," where every episode feels like a heart-to-heart in your favorite coffee spot. Hosted by Dr. Latasha Nelson, this podcast strips back the layers of leadership to reveal the real, relatable side of guiding and growing, whether you're a seasoned pro or just starting out.
Settle in with your brew of choice as Latasha shares her world of insights and experiences, blending wisdom with warmth in conversations that matter. It’s not just her stories, though; guests from all walks of life join in to share their own tales of triumph and challenge, adding flavors of diversity and depth to the mix.
"Thanks for Coming Back" is more than just a podcast—it's a community where we all learn and grow together. It's about tackling our challenges, getting better at what we do, and embracing the leader within. So come join the conversation, and let’s make leadership a part of our daily lives.
Thanks for Coming Back
Speaking, Reading & Leading: Tools for Success
Join us for an enlightening and entertaining conversation with Dr. Danny Brassell, affectionately known as the "Jim Carrey with a PhD." Danny shares his incredible transformation from an inner-city teacher to a globally sought-after speaker and coach. Throughout the episode, listeners will uncover practical tips on mastering communication skills to become influential leaders, even for those who dread public speaking. Danny's journey from overcoming a childhood stutter to addressing thousands is testament to the power of belief, persistence, and high expectations.
Through captivating stories, Danny illustrates how true leadership shines when the focus shifts to making others feel valued and important. Drawing on historical examples, such as Prime Ministers Gladstone and Disraeli, and personal experiences, he highlights the often-overlooked leadership skills of avid reading and effective speaking. Discover how individuals from various fields—from military to entertainment—have harnessed these skills for success, and why executing knowledge is more impactful than merely acquiring it.
Fear of speaking in public? Danny shares actionable strategies to conquer stage fright and emphasizes the power of storytelling in leadership. Learn from the inspiring stories of Danny's clients who turned initial discomfort into remarkable success. Danny also sheds light on the importance of diverse reading habits for both personal and professional growth, offering advice on inspiring anyone to love reading. With an infectious passion for helping others, Danny advocates for service over selling, encouraging listeners to focus on serving others to build meaningful connections. Don’t miss out on this vibrant discussion filled with wisdom and positivity!
Welcome back to another episode of Thanks for Coming Back. I'm your host, dr LaTosha Nelson, and today I'm excited to introduce a guest who is on a mission to bring joy back into education and the workplace. Dr Danny Purcell is a former inner city teacher who has transformed into a highly sought after speaker, trainer and coach. Known as the Jim Carrey with a PhD, dr Purcell has spoken to over 3,500 audiences worldwide, authored 16 books and co-founded the world's leading reading engagement program. His expertise spans the four key aspects of communication listening, speaking, reading and writing which he believes are essential tools for all leaders.
Speaker 1:Today we'll dive into how aspiring leaders, like many of you, can use these tools to increase your influence and impact, whether or not you hold a formal title. So grab a notebook and let's get started with Dr Dani Brassell, I am eager to talk to you today because I, as a resident introvert I call myself a high-functioning introvert cannot imagine speaking to as many audiences as you have, but you've spoken to over 3,500 audiences and the really cool thing about that is, I think no one would deny the connection between clear and authentic and impactful communication with leadership capabilities, but it doesn't always happen on a stage. So, to kick us off. Can you share how someone who doesn't particularly enjoy even the thought of public speaking can still become an influential and impactful leader, whether they're in their workplace or their community?
Speaker 2:I work with individuals, entrepreneurs, organizations on leveraging speaking on stages to increase their impact and income and build up their client base. And yes, I've worked with some pretty famous people athletes, olympians, politicians, televangelists, actors but the people I generally work with are people just like you and me who really don't feel comfortable on stages. And I tell people a stage, yes, it could be speaking to a ballroom, it could be speaking to a classroom, it could be speaking one-on-one. All the world is a stage. I think Shakespeare said that and I have a little bit of experience in this background.
Speaker 2:I was touring India speaking to different schools. I spoke to this huge school, like 5,000 kids, and got them all pumped up. And this six-year-old boy comes up to me afterwards and he's got tears in his eyes and I notice that he's missing his left arm and he says how can I succeed? And so I crouched down at his eye level and I said you know, when I was a little boy, before I was 12 years old, I went to 18 different schools. I mean, everybody called me stupid because I stuttered. And I finally went to a school where a teacher she worked one-on-one with me and she would sing things to me and I would sing them back and I didn't have my stutter when I sang, kind of like the movie the King's Speech, and eventually I grew out of my stutter and I became a swan. But I looked at that little boy and I said isn't it interesting that the little boy who everybody said was stupid and couldn't talk right now gets paid extraordinary sums of money to go around the world to do what? And he just got the biggest grin on his face. He said speak. And I said don't let anybody ever tell you what you cannot do. Everything is possible. If there's one thing, human beings, it's proven and anything and everything is possible. And so that would be my message.
Speaker 2:You and I both have teaching backgrounds and it's kind of an irritating habit. I have very high expectations for my students. I've always had I don't let people give me excuses and it was funny. One of my past coaching clients just filmed a testimonial for me the other day and I was just laughing when he said it. He said Danny's a little bit different than other coaches I've had. He won't let you get off the hook, he holds you accountable and he wants you to be successful. And I know you're the same way, latasha. This is something that's very important to me. I used to always say this to my little ones, and I've taught all ages, but my favorites are the little ones. I said don't let anybody tell you what you can't do. Sometimes you need somebody else to believe in you before you believe in yourself. I believe in all of you. They only give me the best and the brightest. Now let's go out and make this world a better place. You say that enough to a person. I mean you're the perfect example.
Speaker 1:I mean when you're just sharing your background with me, I'm like that's why I became a teacher. I imagine that there has to be a major influencer in your life's journey that's helped you to see the world the way that you see it.
Speaker 2:I spent most of my teaching career in South Central Los Angeles in the Watson Compton area. I realized shame on me, my family, we were poor but we always had food on the table. Both of my parents were in the home, which is a huge blessing, I realize now, and my parents always read to us kids in front of us kids. We always had plenty of access to reading materials, and so when I started teaching inner city and I saw a lot of my students didn't have these things, I basically said shame on me and probably one of the biggest influences in my life she's not with us anymore, but I think of my mother. My mother was so positive with me and I'll never forget, and she actually wouldn't know this story.
Speaker 2:The reason I stopped teaching was I was teaching fourth grade at the time and I had a mother, jonathan's mother Jonathan is one of the most gifted and talented students I've ever had the pleasure of teaching and Jonathan's mother, a single mom raising him and his older sister working three jobs. I always say this to people just because a parent ain't around doesn't mean they don't care. I mean I've worked with intoxicated parents, I've worked with incarcerated parents, but I have never worked with a parent that doesn't love hearing me tell them something nice about their child. Well, jonathan's mother asked me a question. I was not prepared to answer. She said Mr Purcell, jonathan looks at you like a daddy. If you were his father, what would you recommend that I do? And the word that came out of my mouth was move. Because our school didn't have a gifted and talented program and her son was gifted and talented and I knew if Jonathan stayed at my school next year, he was getting Ms Hampton and Ms Hampton was going to destroy this young man because Ms Hampton is a direct descendant of Darth Vader and she was going to load him with all kinds of negative energy. So, getting back to the story, that's when I resigned.
Speaker 2:I wound up teaching the rest of the year, but that was it for me in the classroom and I went into a deep depression over it. But I was at a party once with my parents and my mom was talking to one of my high school English teachers, miss McClain, who's one of the best teachers I ever had, and they didn't know I was listening to their conversation and Miss McClain said to my mom. She said oh, it's so sad that Danny's left teaching. He was such a good teacher and my mom replied but Danny's good at everything he does. I mean, that's the environment I grew up in. I had a person that believed in me, and it's those basic things that I think are important for us to keep in mind.
Speaker 2:I don't even know what your original question was, but it pumps me out that I mean I don't miss bureaucracy at all. That's the worst part of education. You and I have been involved in education. We both went in bright eyed like, oh, I want to change the world and everything, and it's a really tough system. But I think the way you change the system is not by trying to change the system, but really trying to reach students one on one. And that's the secret is, when you have 33 kids in your class, all of them are completely different. You got to figure out what's the fuel that lights the fire for this kid.
Speaker 1:Here's the beauty of what you just shared you didn't stop teaching. You changed the environment, but you didn't stop teaching and your gifts are your gifts. I remember one of the most impactful interactions I had with one of my kids who wasn't even one of my students. He just knew of me because the other students spoke about me, which could be a good or bad thing, but in this case it was a good thing. And I remember he was sitting outside my class one day.
Speaker 1:I don't know why he had been put out of his classroom, but sitting outside my class one day I had my students on task, so I went outside my class and I just came down to his level and these are high school students and I just asked him. I said, well, what's going on? I think I sat down on the floor with him and he just said you're just, you're so weird, like, you're different, weird, like why are you sitting on the floor with me, right? And I said because this is where you're sitting, right. It's those types of interactions. It's like no one's ever done that and it's amazing how much you can teach in that moment over that particular topic. But in that moment no one can tell me that we didn't both learn something from each other, so I love what you just shared about changing your environment, but continuing to use the gifts that you have.
Speaker 2:Thank you, thank you and thanks for all that you did. Latasha, I could actually listen to those stories. Why did you leave? I mean, I know you're in Atlanta. Why did you leave Cleveland?
Speaker 1:Okay, so don't laugh at me for this but, I am very spiritually led through everything, and so at the time I'm working for a fantastic company. In fact, if I had an opportunity, I would go back to them in a heartbeat. A global company that just centralized their operations in a small part of Northeast Ohio. Traffic is not the same. So when someone says, oh, I'm fighting traffic, I think, unless you're talking about LA, New York or Atlanta, I'm not trying to hear it.
Speaker 1:But I used to enjoy everything, including the commute to this place. And I happen to be walking with a colleague one day around this brand new parking lot where they still have all the dust and dirt and everything in place, and as we're walking, I'm talking about feeling called to do something different, to go somewhere else. At this point I'm not teaching. At this point I'm in a completely different field. But I'm walking around and I see this arrow, this spray paint in the path and it says ATL and it's pointing out of the parking lot and I said, well, there you have it. God is telling me to move out of the state.
Speaker 1:And ironies of ironies. I've been here for darn near 20 years now. I don't regret the move. Everything happens for a reason, so ironies of ironies.
Speaker 2:I've been here for darn near 20 years now. I don't regret the move. Everything happens for a reason. You took that sign and you went with it. Good for you, man. That's amazing. Good for you, I love that.
Speaker 1:No, thank you for asking. I just pray that I don't become risk averse at some point and stop looking at those types of things, because you can delay or defer a dream.
Speaker 2:You do have to pay attention to the signs. I mean, it's actually one of the reasons I love speaking. This is going to sound really pathetic. So one of my favorite movies is Chariots of Fire, about a couple of white guy runners from England in the 1920s. One's Jewish and one is a Christian, eric Little.
Speaker 2:And there's this scene in the movie where Eric Little's talking to his sister and he's looking back at Edinburgh in Scotland. He says, wow, I'm going to miss it. And she gets excited. He's like I've made my decision, I'm going to go back to the mission in China. And she's so happy. But then he says, but first I'm going to run in the Olympic Games. And she becomes confused.
Speaker 2:He's like, jenny, I believe God made me for a purpose and that's the missions in China. But he also made me fast and when I run I feel his pleasure. I get goosebumps every time he says that, latasha, because I'm like, oh my gosh, that's how I feel on a stage. Sometimes I say something brilliant and I know it didn't come out of my mouth, and I realize I'm like, wow, god's always been there. And and I know it didn't come out of my mouth and I realized I'm like, wow, god's always been there and I wasn't paying attention to the signs. And I mean my kids, my students. You're a former teacher. You call them your kids, so I used to call them my kids and I looked at them and they would say the worst things to each other and to themselves. I'm like God made you to be extraordinary.
Speaker 1:And I just believe people need to hear that a lot more. So I'm actually currently reading a book by John Maxwell called High Road Leadership. To kick the book off, he emphasizes the importance of valuing others and he highlights that some of us may not value ourselves and so we may find that particularly challenging to value others. But you have to be able to see the value in who you are, especially who you're uniquely made to be good much less the value without someone seeing you like, really seeing you Not just you're another student in my class, not you're another kid on the corner and get to know each of those individuals and say this is the uniqueness I see that you bring to the world, in order for some of us to ever think that we bring value.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely, and John's fantastic. He gives great anecdotes and then if you ever watch him as a speaker, he's got a great voice. He always ends it I'm John Maxwell, I'm glad to be your friend. I mean, it's a little thing like that. It's a nice little touch he's putting there.
Speaker 2:Mary Kay Ash from Mary Kay Cosmetics said everybody's walking around with a sign around their neck that says make me feel important. And it's the truth. If you watch the most effective leaders, when they're with you they're focused specifically on you. I mean, that's one of my favorite stories I share with people. It's called the Gladstone Disraeli paradox. So Winston Churchill's mother, jenny, was a contemporary of Queen Victoria and she knew every famous person of the day, and a reporter once asked her about the difference between Prime Minister Gladstone and Prime Minister Disraeli and her response was phenomenal. She said well, every time I left a meeting with Prime Minister Gladstone, I left feeling like, wow, wow, he is the most interesting person I have ever met. But every time I left a meeting with Prime Minister Disraeli, I left feeling like, wow, I am the most interesting person he has ever met. What are we doing to make the people around us feel important? That's the message.
Speaker 1:I love that. So at some point early in my education I was tapped for gifted classes. In my education I was tapped for gifted classes and I remember reading about a violinist which for me, I was like, okay, that's cool, I guess what is this thing. And we read about a violinist I believe her name was Midori and it was in her textbook and I remember the summer after completing third grade, my teacher took me and my best friend at the time, she got permission from our parents and she took us to a concert, an outdoor concert for us to see this violinist live. Now that would never have happened because I first of all didn't even know that they had outdoor concerts or what concerts were. You know, by at third grade they had outdoor concerts or what concerts were.
Speaker 1:At third grade, Everything we did was pretty much in front of the TV, and I just remember how she made me feel in that moment by saying, of all of my students, I'm going to take you and you to see this violinist. She must have seen that that was going to have a huge impact on us, and so I love that we're touching on some of the awesome things that great leaders do, but I'm sure that there's some skills that are underrated, that great leaders do, that aren't as evident, but they need to be proclaimed, they need to be broadcast. What are some of the most underrated skills that leaders need to develop and use?
Speaker 2:Well, you know, my background is in getting kids to love reading, and so there's plenty of readers that don't necessarily become effective leaders. But I can't point to a single example of an effective leader who is not also an avid reader. I mean, you look at, in the military, general Schwarzkopf read voraciously. They said he could quote Shakespeare. He read in four languages. If you look in entertainment, all of these actors, they're reading scripts all the time.
Speaker 2:In politics a lot of people forget the story that President Kennedy was once asked at a press conference what he was reading and he said oh, a little spy book about this guy named James Bond. Well, mgm watched that press conference and because of that statement they bought the rights to James Bond. And so that's why we have all the James Bond movies was because, well, one flippant comment by the president. You look at athletes. I could have kissed LeBron James before when he was playing with the Miami Heat. Before the NBA finals they showed him in the locker room reading the Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. I'm like I could have kissed the man. I'm like you just did more to get kids interested in reading than I can do my entire life. And then, obviously, in business, you got some of the wealthiest people on the planet, like Jeff Bezos, elon Musk, warren Buffett. You ask any of them how they spend their days. They all spend their days reading all the time.
Speaker 2:Secondly speaking obviously this is what I tell people is you have to grow your audience. The way you grow your audience is by introducing yourself. The way you introduce yourself was by creating effective speeches. And then, third, I actually posted it on social media today. I'm very proud of myself. I don't usually post on social media, but it's a saying my grandpa used to say there are thems that talks and thems that does, and thems that does gives thems that talks something to talk about. So I guess the lesson there is take action, do something. I mean people can talk all day. This is what I like about you. You decide you're going to make your difference. That's great. Make your difference Like there's something everybody can do, even my little ones.
Speaker 2:When I was teaching kindergartners, I looked at them like you know what? You have the power to put a smile on your mama's face. And when mom is happy, pop is happy. When pop is happy, he's nicer to people at work, happy, he's nicer people at work. When he's nicer people at work, all the people start. I mean there's a huge butterfly effect. When I was teaching my little ones or my older ones, as they left my classroom for the day, they always had to hear me say the same refrain as they exited. I said remember, kids, education is valuable, but execution is priceless. Knowledge is not power. Only applied knowledge is power. Knowing what the right thing to do and doing the right thing are two very different things. Go out, do the right thing. Let's make this world a better place. I want these ingrained in the kids' minds like, hey, I can do this, I can do this, I can do this, you know, and if a person hasn't done it before, I'm like, so you have the opportunity to be the first.
Speaker 1:There's a lot to be said about the things that don't work out as planned. I think when we say apply, you can have all the knowledge in the world, and this is unapplied. All you have is almost like a repository right, like you can maybe pull a few items from there, but your experiences and how those experiences actually play out can teach you so much as well. I don't think it's failing. I think it's just you figured out another way that doesn't necessarily work for you, and I can imagine that there's a lot of people in the world who don't act because of stage fright. What if I get it wrong? What if it doesn't play out the way that I rehearsed wrong? What if it doesn't play out the way that I rehearsed right? Or what if it's just not received? Well, what would you say to leaders who may be stuck in stage fright right now around how to get out of that stage fright and act?
Speaker 2:That's a great question, latasha. So this is something I work with people all the time. I'm like there's two ways you get better at speaking. First of all, you need to watch a lot of speakers. I watch at least 10 speakers a day. I watch televangelists, I watch politicians, I watch comedians, I watch press conferences. I watch them in front of big groups in front of small groups, in front of men in front of women.
Speaker 2:I'll give your audience right now a little ninja strategy. I use is I watch a lot of award shows, because when the person wins the Academy Award, they only have 45 seconds to speak. I want to see if they can connect with their audience in 45 seconds. Now, most people they waste their time, but every now and then somebody delivers a meaningful message. So a couple of years ago I think the guy was, his name was Joe Walker he won the Academy Award for best film editing. So this is all the important people in Hollywood actors. They don't care about a film editor and they're panning the audience. Nobody's paying attention. And he's British and he gets up there and he speaks very deliberately and he says a lot of people don't know this, but when phrased properly, the term Academy Award nominee can be used as an insult. Well, now you see people kind of leaning in like, what's he talking about? And he says for example, yesterday I got into an argument with my 17-year-old daughter and she said well, academy Award nominee Joan Walker. All of a sudden you see everybody laughing, he gets off stage, will Smith wants to meet him, denzel Washington wants to meet him, sondra Bullock wants to meet him, brad Pitt wants to meet him.
Speaker 2:Time Magazine said it was one of the highlights of the Academy Awards. That's the power of connecting with people, and this is what I show people how to do. So that's the first way to get better. Second of all, one of my mentors was a guy named Jim Rohn, and Jim used to say you can't pay other people to do your pushups Translation, you got to get in the reps. And so I work with people all the time.
Speaker 2:I'm like, hey, we need to practice. You need to speak to school, to service organizations like Lions Club, rotary Club, kiwanis Club. You need to speak to the Chamber of Commerce. You need to speak to your church, your synagogue, your temple. I had a guy named Gustavo. Gustavo should be president of the United States, latasha. Gustavo came to America, from Ecuador 30 years ago, didn't speak a word of English, worked every menial job, saved every dime, invested in real estate. 30 years later he's worth like 30 or $40 million in real estate. So we were designing his speech and his pitch was he has a real estate training program. It's a four month program for $40,000. That's a big ask.
Speaker 2:But I was telling Sabo my hey, you got to get out there, you got to practice this. And he's like well, I'm going on a podcast tonight. I'm like here's my phone number tomorrow. You got to call me. You got to tell me that you did it. So he calls me the next day, latasha, he's like Danny, you're a genius. I'm like did you go on the podcast last night? He's like yes. I'm like, did you make your pitch? He's like yes. I'm like, did you sell any? He's like 23. So, latasha, you're the mathematician here. I'm the reading guy. If I'm doing my math correctly, he made $920,000 that evening on a speech we had crafted that afternoon and since then he and I are still in touch. He's made eight figures off of this simple speech we created. But what I admire about him was he did the work.
Speaker 2:Another guy I brag about I had a guy, jason, three years ago. So, jason, he said I can't even get audiences. I'm like, okay, if you can't get audiences, go on Facebook Live tonight and you'll get the practice. So he went on Facebook Live and one woman from Ontario, canada, accidentally watched him and he stunk, because you're always going to stink the first time. Well, so then he did it the next day and like three people watched him and he stunk again, but he didn't stink as bad as the first time. Well, he's been doing this every single day for three years. He now has an audience of over 6,000 people and last year he didn't make seven figures, but he almost made seven figures. But again, this is an example of a person that went out and they did something.
Speaker 2:So those people that fear things, you're always afraid. Of the next level You're always afraid. So when a college football player their first day playing in the NFL, they're scared because they're not used to it. They don't have reps. They've had the reps in college. They didn't have the reps in the NFL. When you're a kindergartner stepping into first grade, you're scared. You don't know about first grade. But by day 100, hey, first grade, no big deal, I promise you. Whoever becomes the, they're always scared because they're like I don't belong here Before you're the expert, you're always an amateur and people have to understand that the way you get better is with the reps. The reason Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player of all time is that guy worked his tail off.
Speaker 2:Kobe Bryant had a great quote. He said you work in the dark so you can shine in the light. But people don't look at the dark, they only see the light. They don't see all the work that was involved there. How Gary the golfer has a perfect swing and people always say I wish I had your swing. No, you don't. You don't want to get up at dawn every single day, hit a thousand balls until your palms are bleeding and then you have to bandage your palms and then hit another thousand balls. No, you wish you had my swing without having to do anything, and I love that. I don't care who the successful person is. The way they got successful is they got in their reps. Oprah, when she started off as a talk show host, I guarantee you she wasn't great. Now it's like second nature to her because she's done 10,000 of them.
Speaker 1:They got in their reps, but they also continued throughout what was undoubtedly uncomfortable, because most people don't want to do what they're not good at right. There's research that confirms that if I as you put it suck at it, I'm probably not inclined to keep going with it. So there's something unique about what you're sharing right now, with not just the doing it, but continuing to do it, building up consistency and getting out of your own way, whatever that may look like, because you might have to tell yourself yeah, I embarrassed myself yesterday. In the digital age we're in, yes, it is forever going to be on the internet.
Speaker 1:Now Someone's going to be able to find me, meme me or something, but I'm going to keep going, I'm going to keep trying, I'm going to keep practicing, I'm going to keep putting in the work until it pays off, and those are sometimes the things that people don't really want to. You know, when we say put in the work to do, they don't want to have to get past all those hurdles and all the internal messaging to themselves. I said yesterday, I'm embarrassed, I don't want to do this again. So I think what you're sharing right now is extremely critical for people to hear. You have to push past the discomfort. Life is not just about being comfortable, not if you want an extraordinary life.
Speaker 2:Well, that's what I love about you, latasha you went out and you did something. I mean, 10 years from now, you're going to show this episode to people and they're going to be like man, they both stunk. You know, 10 years from now, we're going to be so much better because we're going to have so many more reps. I had a coach once and he said oh, when you start off your presentation, you should always show your jacked up first grade picture to the audience to get them to laugh. And I completely agree, because all of us looked uncomfortable as a kid. We get our braces or silly haircut or whatever.
Speaker 2:A speaker I admire is Brene Brown. She talks about your vulnerability and I actually agree with her on that. I think if there's one strategy I can share with people, the most important for speaking is don't share your successes't share your successes. Share your failures, because not everybody in your audience has succeeded, but they've all failed, and the more you talk about yourself in those terms, they're going to love you because they're like oh, this is a real human being, this is not rocket science. I've never heard a presidential candidate say oh, I grew up middle class, very comfortable. No, they all grew up in a log cabin core. You have to show the struggle. You can't say, oh, I grew up, I had diamonds in my shoes, $100 bills flying out of my pockets. No, nobody can relate to that. I have a guy right now, well, bodder. He's from Saudi Arabia. I can never relate to Bodder. I mean every three months I'll call him. He's either swimming with sharks in Madagascar or doing an Iditarod in the Antarctic. He's crazy. He's climbed the seven highest peaks on every continent and I say, botter, you can't share that with your audience, because nobody in your audience has done that. I worked with a guy who caught Peyton Manning's last professional pass in the NFL. Nobody in your audience can relate to that. But what they can relate to is moments that are similar and that's one of the strategies we share with people is, you know, you may have had something extraordinary or so.
Speaker 2:I'm a little bit different than some speaking coaches because I don't like getting people to tell their sad stories. A lot of these speaking coaches they love getting people to tell their sad stories. There's three reasons why I don't do that. Latasha, first of all, the world just survived a global pandemic. Everybody's had a lot of bad stuff happen to them. I don't think we need another sad story. I think we need more hope in the world. Second of all, when I'm teaching people, I'm teaching them how to craft their origin story.
Speaker 2:Politicians call it their stump speech. I've heard people call it their signature talk. This is a story that's unique to you. That helps introduce you to audiences. So a friend of mine his daughter was killed in a school shooting and he's delivered that speech a thousand times. Now you've got to be a lot stronger than me, latosha, to talk about the worst day of your life a thousand times. I have no idea how he does that.
Speaker 2:And third and this is where people get angry with me I have one objective. When I'm on a stage, I want you to leave feeling better than when you came in. I want you laughing, smiling, happy. I want you to feel good. I can tell the same inspirational jokes and stories that, to me, it's something admirable about trying to get people to smile. I believe when you tell that same sad story again and again, by the 20th time, those are now crocodile tears and you're being manipulative. Now I'm not saying it's not an effective strategy. It's a very effective strategy and I can point out all the people that do it. But I don't want to have to take a shower after I give a speech. I want to be serving my audience, not manipulating my audience.
Speaker 2:So here's an exercise everybody in your audience can do Everybody tonight. So sit in a nice comfortable chair with a pen and paper libation of choice and for an hour, just write down every story that's ever happened in your life and I don't mean the stories, I just mean triggers, like the time I locked myself out of the car in front of Costco, the time dad spilt mustard on his tie when we went to that fancy restaurant. You'll find in just an hour you'll come up with four or 500 of these stories. So that's the first part of the exercise. The second part of the exercise is then to figure out what's this story really about. Oh, this is a story about loyalty. Oh, this is a story about accountability. Oh, this is a story about responsibility. So if you were to look at my computer, I literally have hundreds of files with thousands, if not tens of thousands, of these stories. So when I'm delivering speeches and I need a story on love, I'm like, oh, here's 80 different stories on love. Which one do I want? That'll help and it's much more comfortable when you're talking about yourself.
Speaker 2:Now, sometimes I work with difficult people. I was with a yoga instructor coaching her three weeks ago and she said nothing's ever happened to me. I'm like really Nothing in your life has ever happened to you. I'm like, okay, if you're going to be difficult. I said okay, if you look at, one of the best-selling personal development books of all time is Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill, in which he shares no personal stories. What he did. He interviewed millionaires and shared all of their stories.
Speaker 2:So, if nothing, I mean John Maxwell you gave him as a perfect example. John doesn't always give his stories. He usually gives examples from throughout history of different people that struggled and overcame. Whether it's his books on communications or his books on leadership, he's always giving lots of different stories and that's why I love reading him. Because some people collect stamps, some people collect cards. I collect stories and that's why I love reading him. Because some people collect stamps, some people collect cards. I collect stories, I remember stories and I'm always looking for those stories. So that's something that everybody can do. And again, those people that are shy out there I mean, well, heck, I stuttered. If I can do it, you can do it. My message to everybody out there you can do this, it's a skill, and speaking is definitely a skill, just like listening is a skill, just like doing a podcast is a skill. These are things that anybody can do. They just need to put in the reps.
Speaker 1:I'm all for a good story. In fact that will make her break my attention in a heartbeat. If you invite me to a movie, I've told people before, unless it's got a good story and it can have gaping holes. Like movie I've told people before, unless it's got a good story and it can have gaping holes, like how did we get from here to here? Or this character never really got developed and now I'm not paying attention at all. I'm developing the character in my head because someone didn't do that Right. So I'm all for a great story and I'm curious how can leaders apply lessons, not just from nonfiction, because I think it's easy for us to think okay, when I think about professional growth or even personal growth, it's got to be a self-help book or nonfiction of some sort. I'm all about equal opportunity for all genres. So how can leaders apply lessons from fiction and other unexpected genres to their professional growth and even maybe their decision-making? What could they be listening for pulling from to help enhance their leadership capabilities?
Speaker 2:Well, you're speaking my language, LaTosha. I mean, you look at Bill Clinton when he was president and he was trying to figure out should we go to war with this person, or how do we deal with this kid trapped in the well or whatever. I mean, every president has all these. I don't know why anybody wants that job. Before they go to bed they're like oh good night, mr President. By the way, there's 500,000 people on strike in this country and this person's been kidnapped. I mean, have a nice night's sleep. How do these people do their job? But Bill Clinton used to read little mysteries and he found that by reading fiction it actually helped his brain formulate answers to questions. John Wooden, the basketball coach for UCLA. He read lots of poetry. I mean one of my favorite poems he quoted no written word, nor spoken plea, can teach our youth what they should be, nor all the books on all the shelves. It's what the teachers are themselves.
Speaker 1:Absolutely, Danny. This has been so fun. I'd like to ask, as we're wrapping up, what's one piece of advice or insight you would offer someone who's looking to take the next step toward becoming more effective and just more impactful, regardless of role or title?
Speaker 2:Well they're doing the first thing, which is listening to your podcast. That's a great first step. Second step is read, and I loved what you were implying is read voraciously and read a diverse types types. It doesn't just have to be nonfiction or it doesn't have to just be fiction. I mean, give yourself a steady diet. You know it's kind of like if you eat chocolate all the time. It's not healthy.
Speaker 2:I read Teddy Roosevelt's biography and I didn't know by the time Teddy Roosevelt was 30 years old, he had read over 20,000 books. So I say that to my little ones. They're like, wow, and I'm like, all right, kids, so we're going to read a lot of kid books. I mean, I read 10 books a day now. Many of them are scratch and stuff and pop up, but I do read 10 books a day and people always think I'm intelligent. I'm not intelligent, I'm not too bright, I just have little biographies, picture books, about all these, the newspaper. I read magazines. We have such a narrow definition of reading. Reading doesn't need to be a novel written in the 18th century. They say kids today don't read. I'm like, kids today read so much more than kids throughout history. I guarantee you, a kid today is exposed to more text today than a kid that grew up in the 18th century was exposed to their entire lifetime. The kids are constantly reading, and when I taught my middle schoolers before I got them reading Shakespeare, we looked at hip-hop lyrics. And then we looked at the hip-hop lyrics and compared them to Shakespeare. And then I could say, hey, you see that Shakespeare, he's just got a different way of talking, just like these hip hop players are a different way of talking. But they're talking about their hood, and now the kids are starting to realize, oh, you have to relate these things, and so that's my advice, reed.
Speaker 2:And just as a thank you to you and your audience, natasha, I wanted to give you a couple of freebies. So if you go to freegiftfromd Again, free gift from Dannycom I'm going to give everybody a complimentary e-book Read, lead and Succeed. I wrote it for an elementary school principal who was trying to keep his faculty and staff positively engaged. So I said, ok, I'll write you a book. So every week I give you a concept, an inspirational quote, an inspirational story, a book recommendation of a book you should read, but you're probably too lazy because you're an adult. So I also give you a children's picture book recommendation demonstrates the same concept. You read that in five minutes. Nothing turns me on more than leaders starting off their meetings with Dr Seuss books.
Speaker 2:And then, secondly, I may give everybody access to a five-day reading challenge. I did last summer for about 700 parents around the world where, every day for an hour, I give you all kinds of reading strategies to get your kids excited about reading, because the more excited we get kids to read, the more likely they are. The more you read, the better you get. I mean, I think schools in America do a decent job of teaching kids how to read. But the question I always ask people is well, what good is it teaching a kid how to read if they never want to read? I teach kids why to read Because I never had to tell a kid go turn on the TV, I've never had to tell a kid go play a video game and I never want to have to tell a kid go read. I want them to choose to do it because they love it. And there's simple strategies I share with parents all the time to show them ways to get their kids pumped up about reading. And you can get all of those things at free gift from dannycom and Latasha.
Speaker 2:I just want to thank you so much for having me today. I mean, you're such positive energy. I could listen to you all day long. I want to hear more about all these and I just love the way you really do talk like a mathematician. I'm giving you a hard time. That's fantastic. Thanks, ray.
Speaker 1:This was amazing. The honor was all mine and, danny, please don't forget to tell the audience how they can stay connected with all of the amazing work, work that you're doing.
Speaker 2:Oh, believe me, when they go to free gift from dannycom, I'm sure that somebody built a funnel where you won't be able to get rid of me for the rest of your life. I'm sure you can always go to. My site is dannybrassellcom. My last name was really easy to remember how to spell. It's spelled like bras, sell. No, I never took any grief over that as a child. Dannybrassellcom, I mean, I'm here to serve. I always tell people when we're working together. I'm like, stop trying to sell your audience, just serve them. If you can help people, whether they do business with you or not, you're helping them. You have a responsibility to help your audience. So hopefully I gave a couple of strategies that will help everybody out there.
Speaker 1:Absolutely. You did a thousand percent.
